Thursday 6th July
This morning started off so much easier than most mornings in this house and I have no idea why? We had a busy day right from the start of the day, as it was Connor’s first transition day into the SRB school he will be attending full time in September (SRB prev post). Now usually Connor sleeps in due to him having such trouble sleeping through the nights so I had already decided last night to wake up early get myself and Florence sorted and ready to go before even attempting to stir him. It can go one of two ways he either jumps up happy or he has a total meltdown and it goes from bad to worse from thereon out. However, despite the late night he got up really well. Now I didn’t want to add pressure this morning and push for him to come downstairs too quickly so I took him some breakfast in bed and he watched his tablet, like a King. Two pieces of marmite on toast and a chocolate brioche. Sometimes it can take as long as an hour to eat, an hour to get dressed and I have to physically dress him which can be so hard if he decides to fight me. I knew I would have to be ready, but he was an absolute delight this morning which really helped. Once he was readywe waited for my Mum to arrive, she was coming as reinforcements for me because Neil had to work and we had no idea how Connor would react to this huge change. Connor is not all that great with new places, new people and large numbers of people and in a school there can be quite a bit of noise, for Connor that is a no no.
We managed to get in the car all fine, with a slight anxious episode over the cars because he is really struggling with traffic at the moment, something else we are trying to work on. The traffic just simply moves too fast, it’s too quick and the cars etc are just too big. Arriving at his beautiful school my Mum was immediately impressed just at looking at the building, the difference in the site compared to his last place is so extreme there really is no comparison. Parked the car we made our way to the reception area and they were expecting us. The reception staff paid no mind to the meltdown that ensued in the foyer because he had spotted their sports day setup and the slide in the playground and just simply had to get to it. They called down to the classroom and asked his class teacher to come out to meet him, by the time she got to us we were mid meltdown and both sat on the floor, me trying to clam him with soothing voice and deep pressure. Once his teacher arrived she got down on the floor straight away, she sat with us at his level. Nobody batted an eye, she new that Connor needs to not see her as a threat and she needed to watch me and learn what calms him. As a family we spend alot of time on the floor. Myself, my husband, our teenage son, my family and my friends. These people that are in my inner circle who don’t care what society thinks when they are sat on the floor in Asda, who don’t listen to the passers by who mutter about the ‘spoilt child’ kicking out in the car park. My people who love Connor exactly how he is weren’t there (my Mum had hold of Florrie) but this lady just got down instinctively and I knew straight away she was going to take good care of my boy. After I explained what the problem was she took us outside and straight into the playground so Connor could go on the slide. He just ran in, he didn’t look back. After around 5 minutes of us chatting to his class teacher and Connor playing on the slide with another teacher, the other children in his class came out to play with him. They had be prepped that Connor was joining their class over the last few days and were excited to meet him. They all started playing together and Connor was laughing his best belly laugh, I knew he was fine. Myself, my Mum and Florence backed away slowly and Connor just carried on running and we could hear his laugh all the way up by the top gate. I knew that I would keep checking my phone just like all Mums do on the first few days, even weeks and given our history of how our boy has been treated, no one could blame me for my nerves. We strolled in the sunshine along the brook all the way into the town, spying on the ducks with my daughter and chatting. My phone didn’t ring. Not once.
I’m so please that the summertime seems to be returning, there have been a few rainy days where I’ve thought that was it. We had our hot two weeks of summer and we were done but the the sun has been such a lush change today and Florence loves to be in the pushchair so it was win win. Connor being able to go to a suitable school is going to be so good for him but at the same time it will be wonderful for Florence. She has never had anytime with me just to herself and with her flagging up a few social concerns I am desperate to get her to toddler groups etc, which is next to impossible with Connor it tow. We managed to have a stroll around the town and grab a coffee before walking back to collect Connor before lunch as we didn’t want to push him too far straight away. He came out witha great big smile on his face and a lovely visual daily diary for me to look at, showing some of the things he had done that morning. We waved ‘goodbye, see you next time.’.
The kiddos had an easy peasy lunch of a happy meal while I did a few muggle jobs, like going to the bank and popping into Morrisons for a few bits. We came home and while Connor chilled out, Florence napped and my Mum watched her crazy Australian soap operas, I popped to Slimming World to weigh for the week. After Mum had gone home with two big bags of our washing (still no machine), we decided to do a bit of sensory play with bubbles and shaving foam in the bath, which is always a winner with both babies especially Connor. Jay came home the usual time and was excited to hear all about Connor’s first day, he is so grown up I take it for granted how he takes everything in his stride. It’s not easy have a sibling with a disability. Connor takes up alot of our time and energy but Jay gets on with it and we are lucky with such a big age gap, that he is happy to be left to himself and his mates. Teenager in residence. The kids had a lovely tea, I treated them to a bit of steak (which they both love) with veg and homemade chips. So now we are all clean, fed and ready for bed.
Managed to get them tucked up and sleeping Connor by 7pm (miracles can happen) and Florrie was more like 8pm, which again isn’t too bad. I was going to work on some theory for my photography portfolio because it has to be submitted in 5 weeks time and I cannot leave anything to chance. Whenever I get time I need to work on things, because you never know when the routine will go tits up in this house and I will run out of time. However, it didn’t go quite according to plan. I lay on the bed to get my head together and the next thing I knew it was 5am Friday. Neil said he did try to wake me and I wasn’t very nice to him, that will teach him eh. So no, I didn’t get any portfolio done, or any writing. Well done me. On a separate note, I can’t believe that it has taken me to nearly 32 years of age to finally do the things I have been passionate about my whole life, and always thought were a pipe dream. Turns out nothing is if you work hard enough for it.
So that’s it, a day in our life this week. A really proud, important day and such a massive step towards a whole new future for Connor.
Natalie Abraham AKA Mostly Mummy